Thursday, May 24, 2007

1st draft.,

before modifying..

Parents are the strongest influence in one's life. For example,

these days you can see many books that put emphasis on home

education which leads parents to realize the importance of it.

In my case, my parents made me and my sister practice

calligraphy and compose poems every weekend so that we would

be able to control our own minds. Although those activities were

ended when I entered high school, they affected my personality.

Many humane documentaries that we can watch on TV, show us

many children who couldn't get parental care from their parents,

coping with mental disorders severe enough to take medical treatments.

According to those results, parents surely affect their children's

developments and their personalities influence their socailization.

Therefore, home education provided by parents is the strongest

influence in one's life.


_Special thanks to Jay..(not this version)
He found some points that I didn't really care about.

4 comments:

Jay said...

You are always welcome.

I wish my suggestion can help to improve your paragraph for 2nd draft.

Jay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jay said...

Thanks,

You too!!